Oooooh hemorrhoids. The bummer down under, the southern swell, the piles, the pressure drop, and of course, the pain in the ass. Hemorrhoids are distended and inflamed veins around the rectum, caused by a mean combo of floppy vasculature and paaa-ressure. Chronic constipation, pregnancy, heavy lifting, trying to solve all the world’s problems, and opening that damn jar of pickles can all lead to ‘roidies. The key is tightening things up. We can learn from our hemorrhoids. Being spread thin and under pressure sucks, right? The wisdom hidden in the ‘rhoids: 1.We’ve gotta work from the inside out- those new Jordan’s are only going to make you feel slammin’ for a second if you’re feeling yucky on the inside. 2.Eat more fiber, drink more water- nourish your fine self. 3.Get yourself some yarrow, the tincture is great. 1 dropper full, 3 times a day can help to tighten up those loosey goosey veins (all varicose veins). Energetically speaking, yarrow is also a potent boundary plant (makes sense, huh!). If you don’t know where you end and someone else begins, life is going to be the pain in your ass. Yarrow helps to distinguish your you-ness, and help you own how much space you want and need to take up. 4. Let the powers of plants tighten up those tender parts. Horse chestnut, yarrow and calendula can help soothe and shrink your swellies from the outside- cause sometimes you need a friend to remind you that that asshole doesn’t rule your life. To use: With a clean fingure, apply a pea size amount of the 'Rhoid Relief to that swell up to three times a day. Best applied at night when your bod is in repair mode.